


The Blind Detective

by orphan_account



Category: Homestuck
Genre: Alternate Universe - Detectives, F/M
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2013-05-05
Updated: 2013-06-01
Packaged: 2017-12-10 11:32:58
Rating: Mature
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 6
Words: 6,593
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/785596
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/orphan_account/pseuds/orphan_account
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>on Alternia there are two separate but equal parties. One made of trolls and one made of strange creatures that suddenly appeared one night. Terezi Pyrope, a young detective with the hopes of becoming a prosecutioner winds up in the care of one of these strange beings. ITs her job to find them a safe way home. A/n: this story is an alternate universe where the kids never played the game. if you have any questions/ comments please either contact me here or message me on http://th3-bl1nd-d3t3ct1v3.tumblr.com/ thank you.</p>
            </blockquote>





	1. Chapter 1: The Unexpected Visitor

_**Chapter 1**_  
 _ **The Unexpected Visito**_ r  
            It had started as an ordinary night for Terezi Pyrope. She was currently standing in the doorway to her office/bedroom, since it had been only moments earlier that she had heard a sudden crash of glass coming from the darkened room. It was true she didn’t need much light, she was blind after all, but yet she had sources of the normally bright, eye-paining florescent bulbs should company come over. Yes she had intentionally bought that kind, it made the world smell slightly brighter ,even if her clientele tended to complain. She was the blind detective and she liked to smell reactions of people to their crisis’s.

           Anyway there had been a crash of glass coming from her room and as she went up to investigate she could smell something that didn’t belong in her hive. Something that didn’t belong on Alternia at all as a matter of fact. It smelled pale, with places that were defiantly red thanks to the fact she could smell more cherries on the air than what would normally be there. She wondered if she should alert her lusus latter about the incident after she found out what the intruding thing was.

          “Ugggg,” a masculine voice moaned out. It sounded as if it was coming from the floor. Terezi made her way over to the intruders body, cane looming over the stranger. She was prepared to rid the world of whatever it happened to be should it decide to attack her.

          “Who are you?” she asked the red smelling creature, “or better yet what are you?”

           “I’m Dave, Dave S-Strider,” the voice nearly gurgled back, “ and what do you mean by what am I?’

            “I mean what species are you. You don’t smell like us. Are you a fiend or a friend.”

            “Oh you know,Im A Fucking Human. And what kind of question is that?” he slurred out this time. The smell of fresh cherries was still filling the room. Terezi could only assume that it was blood, since that tended to be the only thing around here that could smell that strongly of any color. Blood always smelt more defined than normal colors, probably because it was the life essence of all things living, or maybe because it was just a plasmodic liquid that carried various things throughout the body, who knew.

             “A human huh, never heard of them.” she threw the cane to her side and knelt near his body. She felt around on the floor and sure enough along with the feeling of broken glass under her finger tips. Unless he had pissed himself from the impact of the crash he was defiantly bleeding out onto her bedroom floor.

            “What do you mean never heard of them. Where a I an alien planet?” Dave asked confussed.

             “I’m terribly afraid a great injustice has been done to you, You’ve been placed on my planet, Alternia, and I’m afraid that I have no clue to how to get you home. My next question is, where are you hurt?”

             “All over. I can’t feel much of my lower body except for my toes and I’m covered in blood.” Terezi contemplated what to do with the human as he called himself. Should she trust him and help him. Or should she just put him out of his misery. She went with the first option, after all she might have been trying to become a prosecutioner, and even though they were ruthless killers, she still wanted to make it there before killing in the name of justice. After all there was plenty of time for that in the future.  
She griped his shoulders and dragged him to a nearby couch inside of her hive. He was heavy and he screamed out in agony at the action, but she kept dragging him until he was at a place where she could smell where he was hurt easier.

              It was a horrible thing to smell. He had multiple lacerations along his shoulders and upper back and one gash stood out entirely to her nose. A gash that went all the way down his chest and slightly around his back almost down to the bone. How he had survived was a mystery to her, and she instantly regretted dragging him about 30 feet with a wound like that.

              “Now wait here for a while, I’ll be back in a few.” Terezi said not letting her worry show in her voice. She had taught herself to be cool around clients and as long as he was under her care that was what he was going to be, a client, nothing more, nothing less, at least so she hoped.  
           

               She had some medicine to place on the gash, fast acting and on her, healed gashes within a matter of about a day. She then received relaxants and various bandages from her cabinets. She nearly ran back to the boy. When she returned the blood was still oozing from the fresh wounds. She knelt beside him and gently removed the broken shades from his shades before proceeding to clean the scratches there with a washcloth

                “This is gonna sting a little.” she warned him just before taking a washcloth coated in the miracle medicine and dowsing the long gash gently. It didn’t take long before she heard hissing emitting form Dave’s lips. By now the medicine was fizzing, already healing the wounds. They would scar, but he wouldn’t die from them at least. She continued coating the medicine over the scathes along his legs and face, cleaning as she went. Within an hour most of the smaller wounds had healed, but the young Strider was still hissing out in pain. Terezi wrapped the gash in gauze, and then proceeded to get Dave something to drink.  
 

                  In a rush to return Terezi just grabbed a container of juice which was close to the taster of apple juice. When she returned Dave was still in the same position she left him in.  
“ I brought you something to drink.” She whispered quietly. Dave just nodded and opened his mouth slightly. Terezi pushed his head back slightly and began pouring some of the purple liquid down his throat. He seemed to react to the liquid instantaneously, moving his head to catch more of it. She tipped the container up a little allowing him to swallow the liquid.

                “ Thanks.” Dave croaked out.

                “No problem.” Terezi was beginning to wonder if Dave was comfortable. Terezi sat the juice on the table. She could smell the fact that Dave’s eyes were closing and soon she could hear his breathing slow down in pace. He was asleep. The young detective went and grabbed a nearby blanket and wrapped it around his sleeping body, before she continued to listen to his breath. It wasn’t long before she fell into a slumber.


	2. Chapter 2 The Next Morning

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> daave and terezi get to know each other better

            **Chapter 2**  
 **The Next Morning**  
        Terezi woke up inside a room of pure darkness. She could hear Dave’s breathing on the other side of the room still steadily going if not at a normal pace . ‘so it wasn’t a dream after all,’ Terezi thought to herself. Some part of her really thought that yesterdays events had never happened and the feeling gnawed at her stomach as if it was trying to claw her to pieces from the inside out. Then again there was the other part of her. The part looking for excitement, something new. She’d be damned if this wasn’t new and if some part of this didn’t have anything to do with an adventure.

        “Hey Dave the prosecution needs to know if your awake.”

        “Yeah I’m awake. What prosecution? Its not cool to say things like that.”

        “Whatever, cool kid, are you feeling any better?”

       “Does the prosecution need to know about this too?”

       “ I’ll take that as a yes I’m feeling better then,” Terezi said curtly before moving towards the male. She placed a hand over where the bandages began and listened to hear a sound of disapproval from Dave. Dave sat in silence.

      “I’m going to check them now if that’s okay with you, Dave.” Terezi waited for an answer and after a minute of what seemed like an eternity Dave finally responded.

      “okay” was the only response. Terezi then began to make quick work of removing the bandages, and to her amazement found that they gash had healed completely. She ran her hands gingerly across where it once had been only to find a small patch of raised skin. Dave was also stunned by this fact. Never before had he been healed so quickly by anything. Sure he was still sore but by the looks of the scar it might be faded in about a year.

     “Thanks.” That was all he had to say. Terezi turned her head up at the human, her red eyes that were normally covered by a pair of equally red glasses clearly visible to the crimson eyed male.

      “You said that last night.” Was her only reply. She held her composure, much like a lawyer would in a room filled with screaming jury members arguing over their clients innocence or guilt. Deep down she wanted to giggle at the notion. He was so repetitive and emotionless about this entire ordeal. Maybe it was just his personality or maybe his species in general operated like robots.

         “Are your eyes supposed to be entirely red, miss prosecution ?”

        “They weren’t originally they were once a shade of teal, much like my blood.” Terezi explained.

         “What happened?” Dave inquired further.

         “I looked at our planets sun while I was asleep, I had no control of it of course, I was dreaming. Anyway I’m blind now, but its okay because I can smell colors and taste them as well. Its how I “see” things,” she made air quotations when she said see. Dave still wasn’t done with is inquiry however.

         “Don’t you want your sight back then?”

         “ Actually no, I prefer it this way to be honest. It helps with my job in a way. I’m a detective and on my way to becoming a prosecutioner, Dave.” She smiled a little, happy when she smelt his mouth hanging open.

          “A detective huh. That might explain how you know my name, yet I have yet to have heard yours.” Dave hinted.

          “Oh right. Well I’m Terezi Pyrope. And you told me your name last night. Nothing investigative about it.” She held out her hand for a handshake yet when his hand fell near her hand Terezi went up and gripped his forearm. “And that is how we give handshakes here, its disrespectful to grab just the hands, you could very easily stab me in my back if I allowed that.”  
“

          We wouldn’t want that now would we?” Dave said in a teasing tone. “ Do you honestly think I’m going to stab you in the back after you saved my ass?”

         “On Alternia, you can never be sure. Keep that in mind should you ever meet another troll, or even when dealing with me.” Terezi said seriousness dripping in her voice. “ Well enough about the grimness of this planet, I suppose your hungry after spending a full day here with only some weeping fruit juice to keep you going.”

         “ So that’s what that stuff you gave me to drink was. I just thought it was apple juice.”

         “Yeah, its not my favorite, to me it tastes like grape Faygo. I prefer red things. They tend to taste like cherries, preferably candy red.” Terezi grinned, she instantly thought of Dave’s torn red shirt and his blood. Once she realized that she ceased grinning realizing just how much of a pain keeping Dave around would be if a castest was to find out his blood color.

          “Shit.” Terezi whispered.

          “What’s wrong.”

          “I’ll explain over breakfast.” was her only response before she left for the kitchen.

 

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~45 minutes later~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

           Terezi had just finished making a dish similar to pancakes to direct Dave to where the kitchen was. While she was cooking she had popped in a movie. One of Karkat’s Rom-Coms that he insisted that she needed to watch. She never did watch them, but she was also pretty sure that Troll Law and Order would either horrify or scar the human male residing with her currently, if she could even call it that.  
Over breakfast she was finding out a assortment information about Dave, as well as his planet of origin, Earth. She had found that he was 16 there which was her age in sweeps (she did the math. Each earth year was 365 days consisting of 24 hours, while as Alternian years were 912 days long and the days consisted of about 24 hours each.) Dave had also told her of his brother and his odd obsession with puppets and ponies. He liked to lay down sick beats and was the cool kid. He had a fondness for skateboarding and often strifed with his brother, who had taught him how to use a sword at a young age. Terezi decided that maybe later it wouldn’t be a bad idea to get him a sword to defend himself here, or to challenge him to keep herself practiced in combat. She could maneuver her cane in a staff like way and even inflict wounds with it.  
         

           “So, what the hell seemed to distress you so much before you left to cook that fantastic breakfast?” Dave inquired.

             “ Well, you see its your blood.” Terezi found herself tipping her head down towards her plate, a sudden dryness in her throat.

             “ What about it?” Dave’s eyes flickered towards her behind his shades. He had some how produced a new pair, unscathed and unscratched.

             “Well, remember how I said my blood was teal. Well on our planet we have a caste system. The system goes strictly on blood color. Highbloods are fuchsia to an indigo shade, they rule us like royalty. I’m a Midblood, which is about the where bosses would be. Then there’s Lowbloods. They can be either rustbloods or brown bloods. Red is the lowest you can possibly be in the system. A rust red.”

            “And out of the system?” Dave inquired.  
“

             Well there is a rare mutation. It makes the blood a candy red shade. Your color. They don’t even fit in the system. And its very dangerous to be one of them. Highbloods already treat Lowbloods like trash if they are castest, but a Mutantblood will likely be killed on the spot. And based on my sense of smell you don’t look like a troll either. More the reason for them to slaughter you.” Terezi replied grimly. She personally had never cared about the caste system until now. Only when her charge was in danger. Yeah sure, Karkat was a Mutantblood as well, but she knew he could take care of himself.

            "So its basically like a monarchy, except more extreme? And you had me worried there for a minute girl. I thought you guys would fry me up and eat me because of me being a human.” Dave said sarcastically.

          “Don’t say that. I’m willing to bet the thresicutioners would probably do that, and your death would be far from pleasant.” Terezi snapped.

          “Dude, ever hear of sarcasm?” Dave looked skeptically over his shades towards the slightly agitated troll before him. Her hair was a mess and her shirt was lower cut than what she normally wore, giving him a clear view of her breasts. As any normal hormone crazed ,power ranger of a teenage boy would do he tried to restrain himself from looking but failed miserably.

           “No I haven’t. Though if you explain it I might have a better understanding of this human concept.”

           “Sarcasm,” Dave began, “is when one says one thing, yet means another.”

              “So its like saying your gonna kill yourself and the other person replying “’ have fun making s’mores’” then.?” Terezi said.((sorry Justin, if you ever read this I am deeply sorry for reverencing this conversation of all things))

             Dave mentally face palmed at this statement and let out a sigh. He then chuckled and said “It has to be the same person saying it. And how do you even know about s’mores?”

             “Well they are an amazing food. Just like orange cream sickles. And any society without s’mores and cream sickles is a society I don’t want to be a part of.” Terezi stated and waved her hand towards the icebox.

           “Whoa, wait a minute. You guys are aliens, yet you have orange cream sickles?”

           “Yeah, don’t you?” Terezi questioned back.  
“

             Well of course, but you know…” Dave trailed off as he slid his aviator shades back up his nose to keep his eyes covered.

            “Because your on a different planet, you think that we’re really different. I may not have heard of humans, but I’ve heard of your planet.”

            “So you know about things there? So you know how to get me back.”

            “Well I know some things about it, one of my friends watches earth. As a matter a fact the trolls created it. I’ve just never been told about the life there and never really wondered I guess. And no I don’t know how to get you back I’m afraid.”

           “Wait, you mean to tell me Earth is basically YOUR SPECIES high school biology project. That your species is technically out god and you’ve never wondered about what went on there, not even once.” Dave sounded infuriated yet kept his mask on. He would never let his poker face falter, even if his death was staring him in the eyes.

          “ I never said that I never wondered. I did. I just never paid attention to my friend about it. I was either too busy on a case or I was in a FLARP session with my other friends.” Terezi was nearly shouting, her sharp teeth showing in a half snarl half sneer. Who did he think he was judging her because she didn’t know about his planet. She was learning now and the last time she checked it was better to be late than never.

          “Sorry.” the Strider whispered. “ I was out of line.” He was now looking at the table to avoid stating at Terezi’s sharp, red gaze. She may have been blind but her eyes still reflected emotion. Her eyebrows were pinched in and her upper lip was curled in a snarl. He felt bad for making her mad like this. For pissing her off. It was obvious from the start that she had other things that may have taken up her time besides learning about his world. Even her role-playing might have been more important to her, just like his music was to him.  
Terezi’s blank gaze was still fixated upon Dave. She could smell his blood moving a bit faster from his recent outburst. How his face was staring down at the table in front of them. She huffed out a breath before lifting up the dishes in front of them and carrying the dirtied items over to the sink before proceeding to clean them. Once she finished she turned to Dave and said. “ You can stay for as long as it takes us to find you a way back home. I just have one condition.”  
“

           And what would that be?”

            “ That you don’t talk to any strangers unless I approve of them. We can’t have you getting culled before we find a way to send you back. And I’d rather not be sending back a corpse. Or worse. Now, I need to speak to my friend. Hopefully he’ll have us some answers.”


	3. Chapter 3 Mutantbloods and teasing Tealbloods

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> this is where terezi finds out theres more than one human running around on alternia. enjoy. thank you for reading  
> my tumblr is: http://th3-bl1nd-d3t3ct1ve.tumblr.com/if you want to ask me anything about the fic just hit me u there. thanks.

\--GallowsCalibrator Began trolling CarcinoGeneticist at 8:47 pm--

GC: H3Y K4RKL3S

GC: 1 N33D TO 4SK YOU SOM3TH1NG

CG: WHAT THE EVERLOVING FUCK DO YOU WANT TEREZI

CG: IS THE SKY FALLING 

CG: ARE YOUR SCALEMATES IN THE MIDDLE OF WAR AGAIN IN WHICH THE’RE GONNA NEED TO BE TRIALED FOR AFFTER WORDS

CG: ARE YOU FINNALLY GETTING AROUND TO WATCHING THAT DAMNED MOVIE I SENT OVE LIKE A MONTH AGO

CG: AND ARE YOU EVEN GOING TO RETURN IT

GC: NO 1 H4V3 4 B1GG3R 1SSU3

GC: WH4T DO YOU DO W1TH HUM4NS

CG: SO YOUR FINNALLY INTERESTED IN THEM HUH

CG: WELL YOU CANT DO MUCH FROM HERE BUT WATCH THEM 

CG: UNLESS OF COUSE YOUR IN MY SHOES RIGHT NOW

Terezi paused for a minute reading all of what Karkat had just sent her.

GC: WH4T DO YOU M34N 1N YOUR SHO3S.

CG: I MEAN THERES CURRENTLY ONE LIVING INSIDE MY HOUSE 

CG: THE BITCH SHOWED UP YESTERDAY

CG:CRASHED THOUGHT THE FUCKING WINDOW. DO YOU RELIZE HOW MUCH CRABDAD HAS NAGGED ME ABOUT HER.

CG: YEAH I HEALED HER BUT STILL

Terezi processed what she was reading ignoring the incessant beeping of notifications coming from Karkat’s frantic and rather loud typing habits. Karkat was caring(or possibly accidentally killing) for a human too. Surely this wasn’t a coincidence was it. 

GC: YOU S41D YOU H4VE ON3 TOO

CG: WHAT DO YOU MEAN HAVE ONE TOO

GC: 1 M34N YOUR C4R31NG FOR ON3 4S W3LL

CG: WELL SHIT YOU’VE GOT ONE OF THOSE NASTY CREATURES AS WELL

CG:DAMN AND HERE I THOUGHT I WAS THE ONLY ONE BLESSED WITH THE UNIVERESES FANTASTIC SENSE OF HUMOR AND IRONY

CG:HOW LONG HAVE THEY BEEN HERE

GC: H3 BUST3D THOUGH MY W1NDOW Y3ST3RD4Y TH3 S4M3 W4Y YOURS D1D 

GC: WHY

CG: BECAUSE ITS ODD ENOUGH THAT IVE GOT ONE OF THESE THINGS ON MY HANDS

CG: AND ANOTHER FOR YOU TO HAVE ONE AS WELL

GC: K1ND4 F1GUR3D 

GC: 4ND TH3N TH3R3S TH1S 4SSHOL3 WHO WONT L3T M3 4SK TH3 ON3 Q3ST1ON W3 BOTH W4NT TO KNOW TH3 4NSW3R TO

GC: HOW TH3 H3LL DO W3 G3T TH3M HOM3

CG: HOW THE FUCK SHOULD I KNOW

CG: DO I LOOK LIKE AN ENCYCLOPEDIA JUST BRIMMING WITH ANSWERS

CG: A MAGICAL WHATEVERTHEFUCK ERIDAN HAS THAT CAN JUST SPIT OUT INFORMATION AT THE USERS WILL

CG: SOME OUTSIDE FORCE THAT CAN TELL YOU THAT IF YOU PUT YOUR HEAD IN BETWEEN YOUR KNEES AND KISS YOUR OWN ASS THAT EVERYTHING WILL BE O-FUCKING-K

GC: NO YOU JUST LOOK L1K3 4 R4NT1NG M3SS

GC:1N TH3 N4M3 OF JUST1C3 1 SW34R W3R3 GONN4 G3T TH4T T3MP3R OF YOURS UND3R CONTROL

GC: 4FFT3R 4LL K4RKL3S NO G1RL 1S GONN4 W4NT 4 M3SS 4ND 4 HALF TH4T WONT CONTROL H1S T3MP3R

CG: YEAH RIGHT AS IF

CG: ANYWAY JADE NEEDS ME FOR SOME HUMAN BULLSHIT OR SOMETHING ILL HAVE TO TALK TO YOU LATER

CG:BYE 

\--CarcinoGeneticist ceased Trolling GallowsCalibrator at 9:37 pm--

Terezi stared at the screen of her husktop before looking up to smell Dave staring at her from her doorway. He wasn’t the only human an Alternia. She needed to know how many had appeared, and more importantly how to get them home safely. This was now an official case. A test of her mind and will to help them, and in the name of justice she was willing to do everything in her power to do so.


	4. Chapter 4 The Scourge Sisters

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> vriska and terezi talking about hte humans to find Surprize. vriska has one too.

“ Dave, how long have you been standing there?” Terezi asked nervously. She had a bad habit of reading her conversations on Tollian out loud to herself using various voices to imitate her friends. Dave was standing there still as a statue, his poker face still firmly in place. 

“About 5 minutes. The movie just finished and by the way it sucked.” he replied. Terezi couldn’t help but grin at his reply.

“ Naturally one of my friends sent it to me. As a matter of fact he was the one I was just messaging. The one who knows about earth.”

“You mean the one with the scratchy voice as you were reading his messages out loud then yes.” Terezi’s eyes widened in horror. He had heard her conversation as she was having it. 

“Umm exactly how much of that did you hear?” She asked hesitantly, not really wanted to know the answer. 

“Well I could hear you mumbling to yourself since you sat down at the computer. Didn’t pay much attention till I stood in the doorway and heard something about a Jade.”

“Why would you pay attention to that isn’t it just a name?” She retorted

“Well I have this friend on my planet, and we talked via persterchum, her name was Jade and well it sparked my interest.” Dave folded his arms and was leaning up against the doorframe now. His eyes, even though well concealed, were swirling with thought behind his shades. 

“So you think that Karkat’s human, this Jade character, is the same one that you used to have communications with.” By now Terezi was writing madly in a notebook that she kept for when she was working cases. Her notes ,as she called them, were basically unreadable by others, yet made perfect sense to her. 

“Hey, I got transported to an alien planet, by now I’m willing to bet anything is possible. It would be cool if it was., ya know” 

“You have a point there Dave. Were there any other people that you spoke to there that might have been sent here under the same circumstances as you?” By now Terezi’s hand was writing nonstop. She couldn’t afford to miss any of the possible clues to how they got here. After all maybe the way they got here in the first place is the key to sending them back.

“Well, I can only think of two. John Egbert and Rose Lalonde.” Dave stated. “ Then again the chances are slim that they would be here. It would be cool though, but not cooler than me of course.”

“Okay Dave,” Terezi finally finished her writing and turned her head back towards him’ “ I’m gonna have to check in with a few of my other friends, maybe they have a human with them. I don’t know if it will be any of the ones you named, but I can always see if there are anymore currently running loose on Alternia. You don’t mind watching movies while I work do you?”

“As long as its not another one of those washed up Rom-Coms, I’m cool with that. Or if possible do you think I could play some video games.”

“There should be a game console in there hooked up to the T.V. already. And there are a bunch of movies and games on the shelves in there. Just pick out what you want to do, Cool Kid,” and with that Terezi instantly pulled up another chat box this time with a very close friend. 

\--GallowsCalibrator began Trolling ArachnidsGrip at 10:05 pm--

GC: H3LLO S1S

AG: Why hellooooooo my scourge sister

AG: and how would you 8e

GC: 1 WOULD B3 F1N3 1 JUST N33D TO 4SK YOU 4 F3W TH1NGS

AG: Like what?

AG: Did someone give you another case in which it seems as if my lussus has eaten another troll

GC: NO 1 JUST N33D TO KNOW 1F 4NYTH1NG ODD DROPP3D 1N 

GC: L1K3 M4YB3 Y3ST3RD4Y

AG: Weeeeeeeell there was this one thing

AG: I was feeding my lusus when it happened

AG: This little hmm how do you say “thing” dropped in

Terezi’s eyes widened in horror. Did she feed the thing to her lusus. Is the possible human dead, to never be identified.

GC: BY 4NYCH4NC3 D1D YOUR LUSUS 34T TH1S TH1NG

AG: Oh no

AG: It dropped in just as she went for the kill of what I had brought her and since it looked interesting I kept it

AG: He’s odd though

AG: Not a troll 

AG: Why are you asking?

GC:W3LL 1 H4V3 ON3 OF THOS3 TH1NGS 4ND SO DO3S K4RK4T

GC: BY 4NYCH4NC3 1S 1T 4 HUM4N

AG: Yeah he said that’s what he was after he quit babbling about the fact he just saw my lussus kill a troll

AG: sooooooo you’ve got one too then

GC: Y34H H1S N4M3 1S D4V3

GC: DO3S YOURS H4V3 4 N4M3 TOO

AG: Of course he does. I think he said his name was John.

Terezi’s heart skipped a beat as she wrote this down in her notes. Maybe, just maybe, these were Dave’s friends. Her head was spinning with theory’s now. 

GC: 1’V3 GOTT4 GO S1S T4LK TO YOU L4T3R.

\--GallowsCalibrator ceased trolling ArachnidsGrip at 10:57 pm--

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> thank you soo much for reading and im sorry for uploading every two weeks but on the bright side im trying to upload two chapters every two weeks to keep my readers satisfied. any questions feel free to just ask. or comments or way i can make the story better are always apreciated, after all constructive criticism helps/


	5. Chapter 5 A crash course in troll culture

        Terezi closed her husktop. It had been about two hours since her conversation with Vriska and she had also spoken to Sollux and Feferi. Neither one of them knew of what she was speaking about but promised to keep an eye out and if they saw one of the humans to let her know immediately. Terezi removed her glasses and rubbed her eyes. Sure they never got tired any more but it helped calm her down. She sighed and walked into the living room where she found the T.V. blaring Troll Law and Order. Dave was sprawled out looking at the screen and not noticing Terezi until she cleared her throat.

      “Oh, hey,” his eyes darted to her behind his shades as he turned his body to make room for her. “You find anything?”

       “Yea, Vriska my sister, has a human in her care. His name is John and I’d say he got relatively scared on his first day here but he’s just fine.”  
       

       “What do you mean scarred?” Dave’s voice was almost angry. 

      “Well he dropped in on her as she was feeding her lussus, and well he saw something rather gruesome. But better to see than have it happen to you right?”

     “what exactly did he see?” Dave’s voice was faltering, and Terezi could hear the worry in it.

     “Vriska was feeding her lusus,…a…a live troll. He saw it suck the insides of it out. Her lusus is a Spider, so when he fell, he kinda fell into a huge fucking spider web. Vriska got him out and decided he looked interesting so she kept him.”

     “Wait so Vriska basically KILLED another troll in order to feed her god damned lusus, whatever the fuck that is and kept John because he looked INTERESTING. ANd YOU, YOU’RE A DETECTIVE, THAT MEANS YOU’RE A MEMBER OF THE LAW ENFORCEMENT OF THIS PLANET. YOU JUST LET IT HAPPEN?!?!” Dave was enraged, and it was clear. Terezi needed to do something quickly before things got even more out of hand before they already were.

     “Vriska tends to only feed people who are cruel to her lusus,” Terezi said quickly. “or those who’ve wronged her or her friends” she mumbled under her breath that last part. Secretly she wanted to slap herself for being so straight forward knowing Dave didn’t know much about this world. “I’m sorry. I haven’t fully discussed everything about our culture have I?”

     “No you sure as hell haven’t,” Dave began. “so maybe you need to start talking.”  
Terezi walked over to the couch and patted the seat beside her. Dave sat there after about a minute of staring at Terezi and trying to calm his anger. Terezi exhaled. Where should she start. Defiantly not the quadrant system. 

     “You said you didn’t know what a lusus was right?” Terezi’s question was rhetorical so she continued. “ Well a lusus is like a parent to a troll. They guard and protect a troll as long as the troll feeds them. Depending on the troll and type of lusus depends on what they need to be fed. Vriska’s needs to be fed live creatures.”

     “and yours?” Dave gulped. After hearing about Vriska’s he honestly feared that Terezi’s could be worse.

     “Mine lives in an egg. To be honest she never hatched. Dragonmom is who she is. Even though she hasn’t hatched she uses telepathy like the others to speak to me. If she were to hatch however the doomsday scales would tip drastically towards doomed. And she would require a lot of dead flesh to feed her I’m willing to bet.” Terezi lowered her head in sadness as she rubbed her arms nervously.  
Dave sighed in relief but it was short lived. “So if she were to hatch, there would be a dragon roaming free and protecting you.”

     “Basically. That’s what a lusus is. As long as you feed it and do as your told.”

     “Does she give you commands often?” he inquired further. If what he was getting was correct the trolls parents were monsters.

     “Not really. She’s a bit looser on me than spidermom is on Vriska.” Terezi picked at a stay string on her sleeve. Hoping that this conversation would soon be over before she became the victim of a pity parade. That was the last thing she needed. By now Dave was leaning over to look at Terezi’s face for any trace of emotion. Her eyes were lowered and her black lips were pouting, making her look like a little kid with grey skin and sharp, candy corn colored horns. He wanted to comfort her but he quickly remembered the handshake incident and decided against it.

     “So that means you haven’t seen people killed by you parent?”

     “Basically I can’t say the same for a few of my friends though.” Terezi turned her head up and began to rub the back of her neck. 

     “Is there anything else I might need to know about?” Dave was curious. He was after all on Alternia, he didn’t know much about it but he could always learn.

     “Well troll relationships are a lot more complex that what you probably have on your planet and to be honest I’m not the one you want to talk to about that.” Terezi shook her head.

     “And why would that be?” Dave Leaned back.

     “Because only two of my four quadrants have been filled and I don’t think you should explain them without experiencing them yourself.” Terezi explained simply before lying back herself.

     “Well you can always explain them to the best of you ability if you want” Dave began. “I’m not gonna force you to tell me. It wouldn’t be cool to do that.”

     “Okay,” Terezi yawned. She was tied and she had woken up earlier than expected not to mention she was exhausted. She closed her eyes and listened to the familiar sound of Troll Law and Order and sleep eventually took over.


	6. Chapter 6 Cool kids and Alien Encyclopedias

     Dave waited until he was sure that his, whatever she was, was asleep before creeping off the couch and into a room just beside the kitchen. He remembered passing by it this morning on his way to breakfast. It was a room filled with books and surely he could find something on troll culture in here. Hey Terezi might not mind, hell she might even be impressed that he was curious enough to look it up on his own.  
It was a room filled to the brim with books and he could see clear drawings of dragons decorating the walls and ceilings, obviously drawn in chalk. They decorated the entire house along with brightly colored everything. I guess if you smelled color to get around you’d want to decorate everything as brightly as possible, although he had to admit the drawings were relatively good if not exceedingly bright.  
He wondered over to a shelf on the far end of the room, scanning the shelves for anything that looked like an encyclopedia. Instead he found titles like:

  * _Prosecution for dummies_
  * _Oh my god ,what the fuck,and other amazing tales: courtroom edition_
  * _A guide to Alternian law: volume XXXXXIX_
  * _The perks of being a cauliflower_
  * _Harry Potter of Waverly place and the Speedo of doom_
  * _The chronicles of that colordrinker kid with the wired tattoo that looks like lines inside parentheses_
  * _Courtroom protocol for neophytes_



And lastly

  * _Cirque du troll: and the buckets of death_



     After browsing though various tittles such as these he finally found what he was looking for. A full set of encyclopedias brimming with knowledge of Alternia. He took the first volume and began searching for an index. Once he found it he looked for quadrants and found that they were in edition three on page seven-hundred and ninety-three. He set the first edition aside and grabbed for the 3rd one in the series and flipped to the page. It had been bookmarked for some odd reason. He gingerly picked up the red bookmark that resembled a dragon.   
It smelt vaguely of cherries and Dave inhaled the scented air before setting the bookmark aside so that he could read the following passage:

_The quadrant system:_   
_The quadrant system is separated into four classes: Matespiritship, Kismesissitude, Moirallegiance, and Auspice. Each one of these separate classes are represented by a symbol that is commonly associated with decks of cards:_

_Matespiritship:_   
_Matespiritship is commonly associated with the color red and hearts. This type of relationship falls under the pity hemisphere of troll emotions and they are commonly positive feelings._   
_Much like human love/romance matesprits have strong feelings of affection for one another. Though however courtship can be just as rough as with kismeses and can easily switch through one another, it is still one of the courtship quadrants- in which reproduction may take place_

Dave was blushing as he read this. He instantly thought of Terezi sleeping in the room beside him, and that’s when his heart sank. A pretty girl like her, even if she wasn’t his species, was bound to have a matesprit None the less Dave continued to read.

_Kismesissitude_  
 _Kismesissitude is commonly associated with the color black and it is symbolized by a spade. These relationships are tied to strongly negative emotions similar to hatred. Normally both parties must feel strongly about one another._  
 _Not any kind of hatred will do though, it seems to be based on hatred and sexual attraction. Almost like an enemy you love Also kissing is considered a form of showing this relationship. And is also a reproductive quadrant._  
 _Note: there is a such thing as platonic hatred_.

This once more spiked Dave’s curiosity. A relationship based on hate. By now he wondered if there were anymore oddities in the quadrants.

_Moirallegiance_   
_This is more of a form of guardianship between a troll and their morail. It is symbolized by feeling “pale” and by a diamond. Moirallegiance isn’t just about being soul bros forever though. A troll is compelled to look over they morail by fate to keep them in line._   
_Despite the platonic relation that normally appears in this relationship it is still considered a type of romance._

Dave was almost finished reading about the quadrants by now. He only had one left:

_Auspice_   
_Auspice relations are symbolized by a club. Auspices are mediators of relationships, often keeping another relationship functional. There are hints that a relationship between the two medicated parties is a  distinct form of a kismesis relationship and that without auspices widespread black infidelity would occur._

     Dave rubbed his eyes. That was a lot to remember, and he was beginning to wish he had paid more attention to the Rom-Com earlier. He might understand this system better if he could see an example of it, even if represented in a movie. Dave then proceeded to place the bookmark back in its place and put up the encyclopedias. Afterwards he made his way to the kitchen and got a glass of weeping berry juice and went back to the living room where he placed in a copy of Troll How To Loose A Guy In Ten Days staring Troll Matthew McConaughey. Great.

 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> i would just like to thank you all for reading. i know i haven't done many updates and i plan on keeping the updates to the weekends. now that im out of school i can post one chapter each weekend instead of two every other weekend.


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